Are you getting married soon? Are you managing a full load
of coursework, a part-time job, and planning
your wedding? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then this is the
article for you.
I’m a college student getting married next summer. I’m
taking 16 hours of course credit, and I have a part-time job. I also happen to
be planning my wedding. It’s true--things can get crazy fast, but if you follow
my tips for planning a wedding while you’re in school, you’ll be a little less
stressed by the time you finish reading this.
To plan your wedding, you’ll need:
- a loving partner who understands you
- family and friends who will help you
- faith that things will get done and it will be okay
- time to slow down (it seems counterintuitive, I know. But trust me--it’s important)
Follow these steps to transform your ideas into reality:
1) Take a deep breath. Slow down. Don’t stress too much. I
know, I know--it’s easier said than done. But it’s important not to think too
much about everything that’s going on in your life. Just inhale and exhale and
you’ll be fine. Remember to make time for yourself even if it seems
impossible--read a novel during your lunch break or eat a chocolate chip cookie
when you get home from class. Enjoy the little things--it helps more than I can
say.
2) Make a to-do list. There are all sorts of ready-made
lists on the Internet--just Google it. Make sure to write anything and
everything down. It’s important to keep track of your ideas, money spent (keep
your receipts!), etc.
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| Keep a binder and label your tabs |
3) Get the big things done first. Shop for your dress, make
your guest list, create a budget, find your venue, and choose your caterer.
Give yourself enough time to get these things done, but I would suggest getting
these things done first so you don’t have to stress out about them in the long
run.
4) I can’t stress enough the process of budgeting. Have a
sit-down conversation with your partner to see how much each of you is willing
to spend. Sit down with each of your parents and ask them if they would like to
contribute. Get everything in writing--if you don’t have a number written down
that you’ve committed to, you’ll start spending without an idea of what you
can’t spend. Before you know it, you’ll have already spent over your budget.
And since we’re college students, you and I both know money’s tight--budgeting
is extremely important for us starving college kids.
5) Focus on one thing at a time. If you think about every
little thing you have to get done, it’ll snowball. Make sure you focus your
attention on one thing at a time so that way it actually will get done. And if
you’re getting one thing done at a time in a timely manner, it’ll all be done
before you know it.
6) If your schedule during the week is just too crazy, cross
some things off your list during the weekends or on your lunch break. If you’re
starting to get stressed, don’t plan during your lunch break even if you feel
like you’re never going to get anything done--take a real break and relax.
Nothing’s going to get done if you’re stressed all the time.
7) If you have a chance to go to a bridal show near you, I
would suggest going (if the ticket prices are reasonable). At these events, you
have lots of chances to get free stuff. You can also network to meet your
potential photographer (I met mine at a bridal show!), caterer, etc. Some
vendors also offer discounts if you decide to book with them on the day of the
bridal show.
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| My maid of honor and I at a bridal show |
8) Take advantage of anything free! Use your resources and
connections. If your fiancé’s sister is a great photographer, have her take
your engagement photos. If you have ministers in the family, allow them the
honor of officiating your ceremony. Also, there are tons of discounts available
for college students. At my university, people are passing out coupon books all
the time around campus. Don’t just throw these away--look through them and you
might find a coupon to a local bridal shop or caterer. Also, if your university
rents out rooms or has a catering service, you may be able to use your student
discount on these services. Ask, and you just might receive!
9) If your mom asks you if she can do anything to help,
indulge her. Take a look at your list and see if she can inquire about anything
you’re interested in around town while you’re in class. If your maid of honor
wants to do something for you, take her up on the offer. Have her shop around
online for photographers or cake ideas. The moral of the story: take advantage
of free help.
10) Remember that the people who are helping you aren’t just
here to help you find your perfect dress or the right reception venue--they
also care about you and want to help you emotionally. If you’re struggling,
don’t bottle it in. Lean on your maid of honor’s shoulder. Vent to your mom.
Remember, it’ll be okay.
11) Avoid unnecessary drama. There’s plenty of this to go
around during the wedding planning process, but if you can help it, don’t get
involved. If there’s a situation that calls for intervention, ask your maid of
honor if she’ll help. Don’t add to your plate by stressing over how your mom
wants your long lost cousins to come to the wedding but you really don’t want
them to. Just talk it through with your mom. If you need moral support, bring
your maid of honor along.
12) Do your best in school, but remember that your marriage
is a life-long commitment. Yes, you’re getting a degree that may or may not
help you reach your career aspirations, but you’re not going to be in college
forever. Your marriage, on the other hand, is something that should last
forever. Remember to focus on what’s most important to you. I care about my
grades more than the average college student, but I care about my fiancé even
more. If that means I have to skip a study session to go to his scholarship
ceremony, then I’m skipping a study session.
13) Use this time to really connect with your partner and
get to know him or her even more. You’ll probably learn a lot about your
partner that you never realized. Don’t freak out--you still know this person
you’re committing your life to. This is just a new phase of life that will
bring new problems and new possibilities. Be understanding of your partner and
remember why you’re getting married in the first place.
14) Enjoy being engaged.
If you’re a college kid getting married (and I assume you
are since you’re still reading this), follow my advice and you won’t get so
lost in all the wedding planning drama. Don’t get bogged down in all the little
details and don’t think about it too hard. Remember the key points I suggested:
- Don’t get stressed--relax and slow down
- Focus on one thing at a time
- Enjoy this time with your partner
Just breathe. Remember that it’s all going to be okay and
that things will get done. And don’t
forget about the most important part of this process: you’re the lucky person
who gets to spend the rest of your life with your best friend.
